Living Legend, Classic Tale

I may have spoken too soon in the previous analysis when I said Pujols wasn't "hitting them all out of the ballpark, yet."

It seems as though he is in fact hitting them all out of the ballpark. I was there Sunday afternoon, at the new Busch Stadium, to witness this living legend do the impossible, but what's come to be the expected. This man has come to shown us, time and time again, that his numbers are quickly proving to match and surpass some of the greatest that the game has ever had to offer.
First, I'd be remiss if I didn't give props and thanks to my cousin Safi. He's the poor fellow who had to give up his baseball tickets in order to cover some work days for his brother, who's M.I.A in Spain. It just so happens that my sister and I were available to commit to the sacrifice of going to the game. You know, for him of course.

We arrived at the ballpark and made our way towards our seats, not knowing exactly which side they would be on. What we did know was that these seats were on the highest level. Although we were late, my "adventurous" sister decided we should walk up the stairs to the fourth level.


Not up the ramp, people, the stairs. This thing shot straight up. By the time we reached a place that gave us a realistic view of heaven's pearly gates, I was panting and sweating like Jared the Subway guy pre-weight loss era. I vaguely recall stopping half way up and telling my sister to "just leave me and save yourself".
On our way to our seats I also bought my first scorecard. I shied away from attempting to use one in the past, but as fate would have it, I just felt like buying one that very instant. The encouraging look in my sister's eyes was all I needed to pull out the pink wallet and dish out $3 for the folded scorecard and red Cardinals pencil.

Of course, we had to travel one more flight of non-sensical stairs before we made it to our seats. I remember at this point thinking the owners were punishing us for having purchased (or in this case, accepted the charity of) such low priced tickets. In Safi's defense, he's a season ticket holder and it was a new stadium.


Either way, we found our seats easily and looked out at the splendor before us. Easter Sunday included a pleasant weather forecast and a buzzing crowd. Many were still in awe of the new stadium. My sister and I had toured the stadium a week before and so we weren't feeling quite as fascinated as the rest, but still anticipated what the new ballpark had to offer in terms of game excitement.
The stage was set as the Cards' Mark Mulder and Bronson Arroyo of the Cincinatti Reds were each the designated starters for this historic game. It seems the 3.2 miles up to our seats cost us some time and we were a few minutes late, missing the first two at bats. We searched around us and tried to locate another scorecard in the vicinity to see what happened.The masterminds behind the New Busch apparently forgot to have some sort of scoreboard in the half of the stadium we were facing.

It seemed like a regular game as the first inning provided for some mediocre drama. Foreshadowing a duel of a game, the Reds scored once in their half and we scored twice in ours on a John Rodriguez triple. Both pitchers threw well for the most part. It was a quiet game in terms of offense. Our 3-4-5 hitters-Pujols, Rolen and Rodriguez-went down in order in the bottom of the 3rd (still keeping up?).


All of our games throughout the first week at Busch were close and it felt like this game was on the same track.
t was halfway through the game in the top of the 5th inning that things started to take a turn for the worse. Mulder seemed to have lost some of the control I was raving about in my previous blog. Before I knew it, the Reds had taken the lead as Adam Dunn and Austin Kearns hit back to back homers, scoring three runs and giving everyone on this sunny day something to groan about.
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"Keep 'em in the damn ballpark, you idiot", I said quietly to myself as I drew out two diamonds representing homeruns on my scorecard.

We soon found out that this would be the same inning where Albert Pujols would respond by immediately tying the game with a 2 run HR on a 2-2 count. The crowd jumped to their feet and lingered for quite a while before Pujols gave the fans the curtain call they demanded.

As always, I felt chills up and down my spine as the level of cheering went up 10 notches once the 'great one' ran up the stairs and waved. The party-like atmosphere continued to build as Rolen put the icing on the cake, homering immediately after.

Another curtain call, another day at the ballpark.
he day seemed to drag along as the overcast sun etched its way closer to our area. We debated whether or not to get up and get something to eat, but decided to sit it out and avoid the unfamiliarity of the food stands. In the 7th, Eckstein drew a walk and Arroyo quickly erased this baserunner when Miles hit into a 1-6-3 double play.
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The two outs still weren't recorded when Albert Pujols stepped up to the plate again.

BAM!

We all jumped from our seats and marvelled at the shot that sailed away into the left field stands once again. Curtain call number two for Mr. Albert.

Another curtain call, another day at the ballpark.
We all sat lazily as the sun finally beamed straight on us with a few moments of reprieve here and there, the clouds taking turns finding their way towards the sun. It was a good day, a sunny day, and sure, a winning day (Why not?). The content was unanimous and everyone took part in what could have been most of the crowds' first wave in the new ballpark. Relief pitchers were coming in from both sides and although our pen gave us a fright for most of the first two weeks, we felt safe with a comfortable 2-run lead through the 7th inning and the proven Adam Wainwright on the mound for us.

The 8th inning was upon us, though. Do u know that icky feeling you have after a hard day of work or school, and you find yourself stuck in traffic. You know, that tired feeling you have when you just want to close your eyes and be home again?


We experienced that icky feeling in the 8th inning.

Encarnacion took over in right field for Rodriguez and the inning started with Wainwright giving up a lead off HR. gulp. That two run lead was quickly cut in half and we found ourselves in familiar territory: A close game with our unsteady bullpen.

Wainwright allowed another walk before Braden Looper came in. "No, I think he'll be OK", my sister told me. Maybe more for herself than for me. The next hit should've been an easy double play, but if you're Encarnacion and having a terrible first two weeks, of course the ball is going to fly straight towards you with the game on the line. He misplayed a fly-out, potential double play and the inning was extended.

Of course the next player up, Rich Aurilia, would hit a two run double and we'd be down 7-6. Groan. "He'll be OK?" I asked my disappointed sister about Looper.
The bottom of the 8th brought some more dramatics as the bases were loaded with only one out at one point, but we wouldn't cash in on what could've been our only chance for redemption. Cincinatti escaped the inning unharmed and I sat stunned as I watched many people head for the stands. "Where are they going?", I asked my sister, "Don't they know Rolen and Pujols are next in order?"


My sister agreed that they were foolish and we spent the next few minutes explaining why they were dumb for leaving, reiterating that Pujols and Rolen were guaranteed to have their at bats.
Looper easily mowed down the next three Reds' batters in the top of the 9th. We readied ourselves for what could be a great day or a lousy one, depending on the outcome. Everyone cheered heartily as our famous good-hitting pitcher, Jason Marquis, came up to pinch hit in the bottom of the 9th. Marquis hit a solid one straight up the middle on a 1-1 count.


Most of us smiled as the 'great one' strode to the plate. We all stood now, as we knew it was do or die. Everyone was buzzing with unabashed hope. Could he? Would he? Was it possible for someone to be so clutch, so many times, in such a dramatic fashion. "What if he hit 3 homers-the last to win the game?", many of us asked aloud.

"Why not?" I asked my sister as Pujols fouled off another on a 1-2 count. "why not?" were my last words before the next pitch.
BAM!
We all stared in disbelief as the towering shot once again sailed into infinity, into the history books, into the places in our minds reserved for happy memories, classic moments and a longing for this feeling to never end.


It felt like eternity as we wondered whether it would stay fair or not. We jumped up and down like dancing monkeys when we surely felt the elation Pujols was feeling, even in the slightest bit. It was like an out of body experience, sharing the moment with thousands of the Cardinal faithful.

We were all shocked into a happy fervor that continued down the ramps as we left the game moments later, chanting "MVP!" and spontaneously yelping in glee, high-fiving complete strangers feeling the same sense of maddening happiness.

But of course, only a few minutes earlier- before we left our seats-we stood with more chills running up and down our spines, beckoning our hero to once again emerge from the shadowy dugout and give us one last curtain call.

One for the ages. A third one in one day.

Another curtain call, another day at the ballpark.

"Jusssssst a bit outside"

The first week has already passed and I'm ready to give you my analysis of the '06 Cards.

The bad news is the Cardinals have already been swept by the Cubs and the bullpen has blown three games (nearly four). The good news, my friends, is that the Cardinals do not traditionally get off to a torrid start and with the experience of 2 straight 100+ win seasons, I prefer ending hot than beginning hot. Do you like how I said "I prefer" as if I have a choice?

Since we have much to discuss for today, let me get straight to my thoughts on the players so far...

Shortstop-#22 David Eckstein: Eckstein is not hitting well but he's been making up for it with a few key hits or walks in some of the games so far. He's also playing solid defense and like the baseball world always says, as long as you're playing solid defense, we can forgive your lack of offense. I'm not at all worried about Eckstein. He did the same thing last year and he's one of the toughest guys, mentally, that you can have.

Right fielder-#43 Juan Encarnacion: Up until today, my favorite thing about Encarnacion was saying his name. I understand it is the beginning of the season and we have yet to see most of the players, including Encarnacion, play up to their potential, but it's a little more difficult waiting around when a new player isn't playing well defensively or offensively. It hasn't helped that he's left a ton of men on base (I'll look the figures up later) and seems a little too impatient at the plate. He strikes out a lot more than I'm used to seeing our players do. Having said that, Encarnacion made a spectacular diving catch in a losing effort to the Cincinatti Reds Friday and Thursday he was robbed of a walk-off homer which would have made him a hero and had the worried Cards fan forget his early miscues for at least a day. Go figure.

1st Baseman-#5 Albert Pujols: Is there anyone else I could be less worried about? No, he's not hitting them all out of the ballpark (yet) but when it is all said and done, he'll rack up the numbers again and we'll be asking why anyone else should be considered the NL MVP. Oh captain, my captain.

Center Fielder-#15 Jim Edmonds: Jim has scared me this first week and a half. It's not even the strike outs that have me all jittery, it's the 3 errors and missed plays that he would normally make. Maybe his age is getting to him or maybe I'm just freaking out all too early like I usually do at the beginning of every year. We'll see.

3rd Baseman-#27 Scott Rolen: Rolen is making a great comeback with already 12 R.B.I.'s and solid contact in almost every game. Nobody knew he'd feel healthy this early. His dazzling defensive work only further excites me at the prospect of being able to watch his handy work at Third for the rest of the year. He's going to be valuable protection behind Pujols. (sigh of relief)

Left Field-#55 Skip Schumaker/#53 John Rodriguez/#99 So Taguchi

: Needless to say, this isn't exactly my idea of what left field should be. I prefer the comfort of knowing there's an everyday reliable starter out there. Still, all three always seem to contribute in one way or another and I haven't seen Larry Bigbie play yet, who's supposed to be the left fielder. Taguchi and Rodriguez did well last year, so I'll give them time. Schumaker always makes me wonder what kind of parents would name their son "Skip". It's just not fair to him. It's bad enough that his last name is pronounced differently every time he steps up to the plate. Anyways, here's another obvious wait and see combo.

Catcher-#4 Yadier Molina: Besides the obvious fact of what Nan would describe as the "too cute, too cute" factor he embodies, Yadier is very exciting to watch. He's a young guy not afraid to rise to the occasion every now and then. His perpetual downside is his inability to run faster than a comatose snail, but that is where the "too cute, too cute" factor comes in. OK, not exactly, but his defense, offense and emerging leadership makes up for that. He can only go up from here. (except for the comatose snail running, I predict one day he may, indeed, run backwards)

Second baseman-#12 Aaron Miles: I know you keep hearing this from everybody else, but I'll go ahead and annoy you as well. Miles has that scrappy Eckstein like quality that makes him likeable. Is it no coincidence that they both happen to be the shortest starting middle infielders since the beginning of the 20th century? (or was it end of 19th century). Either way, he seems to have played well. Nothing too flashy. I don't know if he's the right guy to start all year for second base or if we should get someone during the deadline. I guess I'm just going through a Grudzielanek hangover and expect the awesome defense and non stop double plays we witnessed last year. He also reminds me of my cousin Hassan. Just thought I'd mention that.

Other Bench Players...

#7 Hector Luna-mostly second: If Luna played everyday like he did today, then I'd want him at Second all year. 3 R.B.I.'s, 1 homer, speed and very nice glove work? Sign me up.

#26 Scott Spezio-pinch hitter: He hit a homer today and I like that in a bench player. He has a chunk of dyed red hair on his chin and that's distracting. As the hosts of "What Not to Wear" would say, it makes me look at his red chunk and not the real him. I like the fact that he's different, though. He gives personality to LaRussa's 'consumate professional' team. He also appears to be liked by everyone and that always makes it easier to root for a guy.

#28 Gary Bennet-Back up catcher: Bennet hasn't really made any particular impression on me. I haven't seen enough of him except for when Suppan pitches or Molina needs a day off. He seems to catch well. He isn't Einer Diaz and, if you know me, that helps too. (Ladies and gents, that was Diaz suffering a Badia-burn. Enjoy, I'll be here all week.)

Starting Pitchers...

Chris "Cy Young" Carpenter, #29: (sigh of happiness accompanied by dreamy look on face) The Cy Young winner still looks up to form. Can't wait to watch the rest of the year.

Mark "too cool for school" Mulder, #30: Seems much more in control than last year. Appears to be more comfortable and at ease on the team, as well as on the mound. I think he'll be better than last year and may win 20+ games.

Jason "you lookin' at me" Marquis, #21: Same old Marquis. Has up and down innings but has done well so far. Still can hit. I still enjoy listening to his New York accent and predict he'll join the mob one day and dump someone's body in the back of a strip club. Otherwise, lookin' good too.

Jeff "lets hold hands" Suppan, #37: Suppan hasn't had luck in his first two outtings. Chicago roughed him up but his start against Milwaukee just wasn't fair. It was Carlos Lee's day. That 2nd start was much better and he keeps the Cards in the game, yadda yadda, you know the drill. I wonder if Suppan gets annoyed whenever we all say "at least he keeps them in the game". I know it's supposed to be a compliment but sheesh. Maybe someone should hold his hand.

Sidney "I punch judges" Ponson, #13: I like how he's pitched so far, a good number 5. I believe he can have another year here in St. Louis like he did 2 years ago with the 17 win season. The fans will be behind him and he's sober now. It's always good to have a man who's punched a judge on your team too. It gives us the chance to say "Don't mess with the Cards, biatch, we punch judges". Hard core, man. Hard core.

Bullpen...

Stock Down-Jason Isringhausan, #44 : In the past, he's loaded the bases in the 9th and walked away unscathed... for the most part. This year, he's just being Izzy, except he's blowing it. His unravelling against the Cubs in Chicago was one of the most uncomfortable things I've witnessed in recent Cardinals memory. His inability to find the strike zone was, gasp, a little Ankiel-like. I have faith that like hitters, Izzy is in a slump. He just isn't getting the job done and it's like he's enemy #1 in St. Louis right now, but I have a feeling that come the All Star Break, we'll almost forget that this all happened.

Stock Up- Adam Wainwright, #50: Ahhh, the golden boy in the Pen. He's been the best we've seen out of the bullpen so far this season and seeing that what he throws is only a preview of what could very well be in our starting rotation next year is great. He looks confident. He looks mechanically sound so far. Cha-ching.

* Randy Flores,#34, has done well. Nothing to complain about. Brad Thompson,#48 , has given up a few runs, but he still seems in control and his pitching says, "Take these strikes and do what you can with 'em, cause they'll keep coming." At least we know what to expect. Josh Hancock,#32 , Braden Looper,#41, and Ricardo Rincon,#73, are still in the "learning what our roles are" stage. They've been shakey as well, but we'll give them their time, for now. Can I also just say that with a name like Ricardo Rincon, you were meant to be seen on television. Unlike Skip Schumaker's parents, Rincon's parents knew what they were doing. Bravo.

**Let me hear about your own thoughts for the team so far.

***Tomorrow I'm going to my first game of the regular season. I'll let you know how it goes (Mulder vs. Arroyo). Come on back now, ya hear!?

Goodbye Winter, Hello Baseball

Au revoir you sorry excuse for cold weather. I'm ready to start my baseball season again. Even while snow covered the St. Louis grounds for the first day of Spring, I was busy basking in the glow of my happiness, for Spring means baseball has arrived. At long last.

Needless to say, last season did not exactly end the way I had hoped. Still, the Cardinals were in contention and that's almost all I can ask for. (A World Series wouldn't hurt, though)

I don't know how I managed to survive the long and arduous offseason, especially the sorry way the Rams and Blues played. I guess I kept myself happy with Pujols finally winning the MVP (mooohooohahaa...)and Carpenter winning the Cy Young (....hahamoohoohahahaa). Take that haters.

I missed baseball so much that I had to edit this post and take out the part about not even caring if I heard about the Yankees and Red Sox. Well, baseball season arrived before I posted this and I realized my desperation fogged my brain waves. I've already heard too much Yankees and Red Sox and it's not even been a full week of baseball. Go figure. I think my point was I just needed to hear, see baseball and be around it.I just like to have the T.V. on a baseball game, if nothing else.

As far as this Spring has gone, I tried to keep up with the World Baseball Classic. Contrary to a lot of other so called experts' opinions, I was diggin' the whole thing. Seeing the star players on the Dominican team alone got me salivating like a dog with rabies(what,I can say that).I even stayed up one night until 3-4 am just so I could watch a game they hadn't televised until 1 am on ESPN and see Pujols hit a homer and have a 4 RBI game. I needed that. It's my vitamin B. You know, Vitamin-Baseball. ( yeah I said that too!)

As for future news, if you're anything near a Cardinal fan, you know that tickets to the new ball park are pretty much sold out. I swear its been a virtual reenactment of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Every ticket is a golden one. In fact, if you were to see my sister hold up the standing room only tickets she recieved in the mail the other day, you would've thought she had her ticket to freedom or something.

On that note, we, as in me and the other half of my dynamic duo of baseball , Nan, managed to get tickets to a game at the end of April and we also plan on going to Chicago in the end of June to watch a Cards/White Sox game. We initially tried to get Cubs tickets, but apparently all Cubs fans want to witness their asses getting kicked. Fine by me. I'd just as soon watch their asses get kicked on T.V. I kid, I kid, Cubs fans. (but seriously, I forgot what our foots looked like, can you kindly remove them from your arses?) No seriously, kidding. Excurse me..I mean, excuse me.

We also managed to get open house tickets to preview the new Busch before opening day. Yup, we're that nerdy, we got limited, complimentary tickets to a viewing of Busch before it opens for the public. What u gonna do about it!? Oh Snap!

Well, this is just the warm up. Tonight I will finally get to see a Cardinals game. Stay tuned for my review of the ballgame.

Come on back now, ya hear!?

Sports, dinner and celebrities, oh my!

• I volunteered at a Sports Celebrity dinner which raised money for the MS society on Wednesday Feb. 15. Here's how it went...

I arrived there late if you're going by the Central Time Zone, but pretty much on time if you're going by Arab Standard Time (AST)! My friend Sheri, who was supposed to greet guests alongside me at the Renaissance Grand Hotel downtown, apparently got food poisoning. (Don't go to Red Lobster. Which one, you ask? Does it matter?)So I was stuck by myself for an hour and a half waiting by the side door where I would practically fawn after any and everyone who walked by...
"Good evening! Are you here for the Auction?!" God I must've sounded like such an ass.
So there I was for the longest time, all by my lonesome, with only the janitor guy who periodically came by to give me creepy looks, only to decide at creepy look number 6 to make small talk, asking me where I was from.
I told him I was Arab and he stared for a moment, making me slightly more uncomfortable, especially when he said, "Man oh man, you Middle Eastern women are beautiful!" This was the last thing I wanted to hear from the janitor. Well, second to last thing. It probably would have been worse if the words, "kill", "eat you" or "precious" were uttered. Nonetheless, they weren't, so I replied, "Thank you on behalf of all Middle Eastern women." At least I had my manners. (Plus, I'm not one of the better looking Middle Eastern women, but thank you mister!)
I tried to change the subject by asking if he saw many different types of people come by the hotel. I knew he probably did. It was a hotel in downtown St. Louis, but he was stupid enough not to catch on to my purpose.
Janitor: "Sure, sure...all different types of people."
me: "what kind of people?" (God, this is so stupid)
Janitor:"You know, different types", and with a thoughtful look he said, "I've seen Jews" and amazingly, he stopped at that....
At this point I wanted to laugh hysterically out loud, because I thought it was odd that the only type of people he saw at the Renaissance Grand, that he could think of, were Jews and that it seemed like he purposefully said "Jews" to get a crazy response out of me. Apparently, my being Arab might cause some inexplicable reaction to the word. I wanted to explain to him that I wasn't going to pull my sword out, make yelping noises with my tongue and take him hostage because God willed it. But then I thought, "why bother?".
Janitor: "you know, I like all types of people."

me:"um, that's nice."
Janitor:" You don't believe me? Look at my wife" and with those words, he withdrew his wallet to show me his white wife. He was African American.
me:"Wow, I believe you now", I said sarcastically. He laughed. I think he felt I was convinced.
Janitor:"I'll be back later!" And with that, he pulled out his walkie talkie, acting like the use for it in that moment was dire. In that moment,  he yielded all the power in the universe because this device could loudly transmit messages and make beeping noises. It was like Heman yielding his sword high above his head,that pride.

Of course, I didn't wait around to see if the man with amazing conversational skills would prove me wrong and not come back. I went to get a snack and can I just say, this was probably the best volunteer food I'd ever seen. There were rolled sandwiches, cake, water, fruit, chips. In other words, the works. Hello inner fatty awakening in me! It was fitting, since I binged on food on my way over to the event, thinking they'd only have rabbit food or pretzels. Like the true opportunist I am, I took a bag of chips and bottle of water just because it was free.
Now, the next part of the evening is where it gets fun. As part of my volunteering, I was also a spotter. During a live auction, I would raise my amazingly dorky "star on a stick" contraption to alert the auctioneer with the microphone if any of the guests at my four tables were bidding on an item. This star-stick thing instantly raised my dorky level by two or three notches on the dork rictor scale. (Ignore the possibility of my dorkiness already being off the charts.)

I'm not proud to say that the star was huge and shiny. If I took it to an airport, they would've arrested me for fear of this weapon and my intent, as it's points at each end were sharp enough to cut through a penny and its surface was shiny enough to blind any innocent passerbyer. The airlines should update their list of things to look out for and place "star-stick" right on the top, next to "more than 3 ounces of fluid."
Anyway, I feared the worst as the live auction spotter. I imagined myself twitching and flailing my arms about uncontrollably, making someone pay $3,000 for a trip they didn't want. But I was more excited about seeing the "celebrity" guests than anything else. Ozzie Smith was rumored to be on his way. The murmerings of interest were circulating around me and I joined in on the dorky groupiness (yes. The notch went up!).


"Is it true?" I asked a girl I had befriended beside me.

"yeah yeah, he's on his way", she assured me and the murmerings persisted.

 Then there he was in all his hall of fame glory. As handsome and awesome and obvious as he could be. The murmerings subsided as we all stared in awe, as if waiting for him to make his famous flip right then and there. He decidely made a point not look our way as we waited out in the hall for the guests to finish their dinner, or perhaps he was so used to people staring that we were just an afterthought. Maybe both. Either way, we were the unimportant auction spotters. I was tempted to yell, "Ozzie!" but decided my dorkiness had its barriers. I was not going to yell "Ozzie!" while carrying the amazing star-repellent Star-stick.
We entered the ballroom and made our way towards our assigned tables. I was lucky enough to get four tables in the front, next to the head table seating the celebrity guests. OOOooooooooh.  I could not have been happier with my arrangements, I had a great area. Only, I felt very self concious and imagined all my rich, white friends around me commenting on how large my behind was.


I could hear them now..."Look at that Mexican girl's rear end, Richard! It's absolutely horrific!"

"Oh Mindy, you are quite the gem!" (region of tables within earshot of this hoighty toighty remark are heard ha-ha'ing and giggling with rich, unabashed glee)

I was told to make the guests of my volunteering selection aware of my job as their spotter. It was the hardest thing to catch their attention. If felt like I was interrupting their dinner party. I wasn't even sure if they understood me because they would barely respond. I looked at other spotters in the area to see if the same was happening to them and went back to my table intent on getting the message out regardless of their interest.

"Richard, make the Mexican girl go away!"
I looked up from my position to see who else I could identify at the head table. There was Jamal Mayers of the St. Louis Blue. But before I could thoroughly continue acting on my curiousity, the auctioneer began. A few guests at my table were really involved in the first item on the list of items to be auctioned.

Heart. Pounding.

 It proved for some interesting moments, especially when I had to yell for the auctioneer to look my way when he strayed off for too long as I waved my Star a la Stick. By the way, I wasn't being ghetto, this was something I was advised to do before I had gone in the ballroom. We had to "make sure the guest's bid didn't go unnoticed." Sir, yes sir!
For the rest of the evening, though, my area was peaceful. (And by peaceful, I mean disappointing in the inaction). Auctioned items ranged from golf memberships at exclusive golf courses to two tickets to opening day with special seating, a tour of the new Busch before the game and a sit down interview with Mike Shannon and John Rooney during the game.

As my area remained quiet, I was able to identify Mayor Francis Slay, John Rooney, Dick Ford and others at the head table as well. I guess they were using the term "sports celebrity" lightly. Still, I can't say I wasn't happy to see Dick Ford anyway.
I wish I could tell you that Ozzie flipped over to me and we sang a few tunes together, but my evening ended at that. I left the ballroom and made my way out the door as soon as humanly possible. But not before the event coordinator could say, "Thanks for helping out, Bodd-ee-ya", adding her name to the list of thousands who've never missed an opportunity to butcher my name.


My name's been butchered so much that it's rumored the letters 'A' and 'D' in my name are delicacies in Iceland.

Anyway, that was my evening. Hope ya enjoyed. I pretty much did. I would've enjoyed it more if any of the current Cardinals or Tori Holt were there. Either way, still fun.

By the way, I'm definately volunteering next year too. (wink wink)

Confessions of a Palestinian American

When I used to live in Palestine, I would become so frustrated with the Israeli governments policies, everyday terror tactics and demeaning collective punishments that I would promise myself, every day, that when I returned to America I would let everyone know how the Palestinians were treated and how angry and frustrated we were as a people. Keep in mind that the majority of my living conditions ocurred during the so called peace treaty, between 1993 and 1998. Most would say that this was a good time to be a Palestinian, considering our usual living conditions. Sadly, that doesn't say much about the current living conditions for Palestinians.

I'm ashamed to say that once I returned to America, I quickly adapted to the comfortable lifestyle. It seems that not worrying about checkpoints, angry teenage Israeli soldiers with guns and the illegal whims of the Israeli government, quickly got to my head. I didn't keep my end of the bargain. Sure, I have friends and relatively interested aquaintances who I've explained "the situation" to whenever convenient. But my action, or rather, inaction since my return here has been disappointing to say the least. I have to wonder, if living in an apartheid isn't enough to use my freedom here to try to better the situation of the Palestinians left behind, how on Earth can I get anyone else here to make a change or expect anyone else to care.

Convenience has always been one of the practices that I've blamed governments for, in the past. If a situation or dilemma inconveniences a government, they set it aside or ignore the issue, maybe making a statement to shut up the arguers. Unbeknownst to myself, I began to adopt and depend on convenience as well. If I became tired with an issue, I turned off the TV. In Palestine, you can't turn life off. It just keeps going, no matter how difficult facing it is.

Here I am, having come full circle, almost as frustrated as if I were still living there. I feel like I can't even do anything, when I know full well that I have all the tools and freedom necessary to actually do something.

I'm in an almost paradoxical situation. In one sense, I've never in my life been more proud to be Palestinian American. It's knowing that the striving and hardships our people have gone through have made them, and me, stronger. We are so secure in our convictions and belief that the occupation of Palestine and treatment of Palestinians are wrong. It makes us more sympathetic to the causes around us because we know what it feels like and that is truely a blessing in disguise.

It's hard to explain. To give you an example, it's like having someone you love contract Cancer and see how miserable they feel. You know that you must do anything and everything you can to find a cure for that disease. Perhaps this new sense of responsibility will help someone else in the long run. If you hadn't had that person face the disease, you, sadly, would not have cared or sympathised as much , if it did not directly affect you.

In another sense, I've never been more ashamed to be a Palestinian, because I, again, know full well the hardships the Palestinians continue to endure, have lived even a fraction of it and I haven't even been close to doing what I'm capable of doing to help. My responsibility as a Palestinian American is to change what is happening to the Palestinians and I'm not coming through for them. In that sense, I've failed them and myself.

What's even more frustrating is how biased the news is. Even PBS, for God's sake, was doing a report about the Palestinian-Israeli situation recently in which they strongly suggested that the Israeli created "Apartheid Wall" which they built on illegally occupied and confiscated Palestinian land was mostly the reason for the diminishment of suicide bombings and security of Israel. The fact the wall destroyed Palestinians' homes, land agriculture, way of life and separated families was an afterthought. It felt like a footnote the reporter suggested because it was an obligation. It seems like anything the media reports about the Palestinians' lives are obligated footnotes, if any. They've made up their minds. Israel is America's ally and that is the end of discussion.

Here's a few things points of interest ignored by the media...

1.) Palestinians, and frankly the Arab world, view Sharon, Israel's so called warrior/hardliner and Bush's "man of peace" as a genocidal maniac and war criminal. Following the horrendous massacres at Sabra and Shatila, Palestinian refugee camps in southern Lebanon, in 1982 "Sharon and seven other Israeli officials, including Begin, were found guilty the next year by an Israeli commission of “indirect responsibility” for the massacres. Sharon was also found to have “personal responsibility,” and he was ordered to resign or be removed as defense minister."

In one account of that night, "Phalangists killed civilians indiscriminately in the camps. There were no PLO guerrillas, though Israel had claimed there were, so the women, children and old victims were defenseless. Whole families were gunned down or knifed to death. One infant was stomped to death by a man wearing spiked shoes. Another refugee was killed by live grenades draped around his neck.[12] Bulldozers were brought in, mass graves hastily dug and truck loads of bodies dumped in them. Throughout the night, the shooting and the screams did not stop.[13] The killing lasted until the morning of Sept. 18." "The official Israeli commission of inquiry into the massacres concluded that 700 to 800 persons had been killed in the two camps.[14] Non-Israeli estimates were considerably higher. The Palestine Red Crescent put the number at over 2,000, while Lebanese authorities reported that 762 bodies were recovered and 1,200 death certificates issued.[15]" (http://www.thetruthseeker.co.uk/print.asp?ID=187)

2.)Needless to say, the Palestinians were disgusted at Israel's election of Sharon in 2000. In this sense, Palestinians scoff at Israel's suggestion that Hamas, a group the Israelis and Americans have listed as a terrorist organization, has no place in government and that the Palestinians have made a decision against peace. To Palestinians, all the leaders the Israelis have been choosing have had no inclination towards peace. The illegal Israeli settlements built on occupied Palestinian land alone shows the Palestinians that actions speak louder than words. Telling a nation that peace is the only way and showing them that settlements are built on Palestinian land regardless of the legality and ethics are another thing. In an article of the New York Times published on April 14, 1983 "Raphael Eitan, Israel's military chief of staff, speaking of plans to increase Jewish settlements in the occupied territories, said: “When we have settled the land, all the Arabs will be able to do about it will be scurry around like drugged roaches in a bottle.” (http://www.thetruthseeker.co.uk/print.asp?ID=187)

To help you understand what Israeli settlements are, here's a definition from "http://www.palestinemonitor.org/factsheet/settlement.html":

"Settlements are essentially large housing projects built illegally by Israel on land confiscated from Palestinians within the West Bank, Jerusalem and Gaza Strip. These settlements are joined to each other and to Israel through "by-pass" roads, which are for the exclusive use of Israelis and which are also built on privately owned Palestinian land confiscated by the Israeli government. Israeli settlements affect Palestinian daily life and impact long-term Palestinian developmental needs. They ensure that Palestinians live in a continuous state of insecurity and fragmentation and therefore prevent economic, social and political development."

What Americans do not know is that, "The population growth within the Israeli settlements is almost four times greater than that of Israel itself, contradicting any claim that this increase is due to "natural population growth". According to the Israeli Bureau of Statistics the percentage of increase in population in the settlements from 1995 to the end of 1998 was 24.8% as compared to 6.6% in Israel." (http://www.palestinemonitor.org/factsheet/settlement.html)

What's even more frightening, "Built-up Israeli settlement areas in the West Bank cover less than 2 percent of the land, but government planners have intentionally given settlers control of more than 40 percent, the Israeli human rights monitoring group B'Tselem said(...)" (http://www.rense.com/general25/40.htm).

3.) Finally, the Palestinian turnout in the elections showed how hungry the Palestinians were for democracy, something many Americans and Israelis question, when 77% of at least 1.5 million eligable Palestinian voters voted. If so, this shows that 77% of eligable occupied voters living in squalor were more willing to vote than the roughly 50% of Americans, in the most recent elections, living in over 200 years of independence. Although many question the voting choice of Palestinians, I have two things to point out.

1.) one name for you: George W. Bush. There's no excuse for THAT.

2.) Although many view the recent election results as a Palestinian step away from peace, an upcoming Newsweek article I read which can be seen at: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/11080943/site/newsweek/, showed some interesting statistics. Among them, "Three quarters of all Palestinians, including more than 60 percent of Hamas supporters, are willing to support reconciliation between Palestinians and Israelis based on a two-state solution." Please read the article, it's very inciteful.

Perhaps I've written much more than people generally care to read or hear about. But if I, as Palestinian, can't even find the time of day to write a blog entry even scratching the surface of the Palestinian issue, when exactly should I expect the rest of the world to care?

For more information on the Massacre of Sabra and Shatila, among countless websites, you can visit:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/2255902.stm

http://electronicintifada.net/bytopic/145.shtml

Top Ten things to do on a bunny rabbits' list...

Rabbits aren't exactly on the top of my agenda list when it comes to writing what I think about on a daily basis. But seeing a rabbit attempt to outrun a truck recently, coupled with having seen a street full of dead animal carcasses (which I fondly recall naming "The massacre on Thoele street") the year before and actually killing a running rabbit the year before that have provided enough inspiration to come up with a new Top Ten list of what bunny rabbits would have on their "To-Do Lists" if they weren't so busy attempting suicide, of course....

• 10.) Officially blame Thumper, of Bambi, for the bunny-rabbits' downfall in society. Punishment? Execute the jerk. Not that things were great before Bambi, but Thumper didn't help by annoying millions. 9.)Shave off my tail. The cute puffy tail hasn't helped my image thus far. 8.) Sue the company that makes rabbit feet into good luck charms, those sick bastards. 7.)Create a birth control pill for all the rabbits. Think of the money I could make. Note to self: Steer clear of paved roads. 6.) Officially blame the Trix rabbit for the bunny-rabbits' downfall in society. Punishment? He has to eat his own damn cereal for the rest of his life. The Trix on you, silly rabbit. 5.) Eat some grass and mess up someone's garden. Note to self: Steer clear of paved roads. 4.) Try to find a gig with the Cadburry Egg Company. It's never too soon for Easter. Remember that rabbit in last year's commercial, the one who looked like he wanted to kill himself? That was my cousin Roofus. He ran across a paved road. 3.) Sit awkwardly when a human approaches and act like everything's cool. Then when the human stops at the sight of me, munch my grass ever so slowly, thinking of my next move. THEN, hop away like a crazy fool and repeat cycle. Note to self: Steer clear of paved roads. 2.)Run randomly across paved roads, especially when I see a large, loud metal structure coming straight for me. 1.) ..................

Life in the Third World

I'm ready to let you know a little bit more about my life. I'm not only a Cardinals fan, ya know. Sure I love that team with the enthusiasm of a fat man at a buffet, but there's more to my life than sports. One of the biggest experiences that have shaped the way I am and how my life has become was having lived in Palestine for five years. Chances are, unless you lived under a rock for most of your life, you've heard about the Palestinian-Israeli conflict. I'm not here to get into specifics (we'll save that for another day). Instead I thought it would be interesting to point out the most memorable parts of my life, living in an occupied country. I didn't live in the best or worst situation, just our own personal situation for that time. Here's what I learned.

• Lizards are really hard to kill. No seriously, they're like Superman. I found myself having to go serial killer on their ass' and chop them into pieces. It seems that they can regrow tails. So, if you're ever in the situation where you have to duel a lizard, go for the head or run.
• British people call garbage the "rubbish". It gets even more awkward when they ask you to throw the rubbish into the rubbish. I'm not judging. It's just that I've never heard an american tell me to throw the 'garbage into the garbage'. I mean, you have to add the word "can" in there or use some variety.
• Misquitos are assholes everywhere. Their job is to buzz into your ear, prevent you from sleeping and suck your damn blood. We should stop calling convicted criminals 'felons' and start calling them "misquitos".
• Water is taken for granted in the United States. There were days when there was water and there were days when there wasn't water. Whenever there wasn't water it was the damn Israeli government's fault and whenever there was water, it trickled down like the anorexic part of nature that it was.
• You shouldn't allow your brothers to roll you in a barrel. Even the empty one that's supposed to collect the anorexic water. I learned that a certain washer and drier sort of experience occurs. If you do intend on rolling in a barrel, make sure you hold onto the opening or you're screwed.
• Guys are very perverted no matter what part of the world you're in. I don't know if it's some sort of need to grab attention or whatever Freudian crap you guys go through, but you will sing, dance or stalk a girl anywhere you are in the world. It seems that there's a little bit of Broadway in all of you. Redirect your talent for cheesey, perverted lines and cheap entertainment into your life ambitions and we might have something.
• Scorpians and Snakes are ,indeed,as scary as you think they would be. They aren't any smaller or less scary than they appear on T.V. and they will probably kill you even if you try to avoid them. I find that throwing a large rock at them from a safe distance is the best bet to kill them before they kill you. Don't worry, there is no guilt associated in their death and someone will eventually brush them off the side of the road.
• There exists a breed of Teenage Mutant Ninja Ants. Seriously, these things have grown to three times their size and they hurt you. They are very aggressive and can probably each eat a pizza.
• Americans don't know what sunsets look like. In America, there's that hot, bright thing that kind of disappears as evening falls. In Palestine, there's a huge mass of a star that sets over a back drop of a thousand scenic colors where you don't know where heaven begins and Earth ends. There's a horizon and everything. It's crazy beautiful.
• You can survive off of oranges. Apparently, as five of my other family members and I moved into our grandparents abandoned, built pre-1967 war, 1 bed room home that's located on the grave yard, my mother forgot to actually buy groceries and made sure to stock up on an endless supply of oranges for the first week or two.
• Graveyards aren't that scary. Um, at least, not in the day time.
• When the government tells you to avoid a certain food item, listen to them. I was told not to drink this fruit drink but was left with no choice when I found myself at school during lunchtime and having only a half shekel (the equivalent of 15 cents at the time) and "fruity" as the only liquid I could afford. Needless to say, I was food poisoned for a week.
• Some schools won't stop selling items deemed dangerous by the government. I mean, what the hell?
• Dogs left on their own in nature go crazy -bezerk, cats left on their own remain regular ol' cats. I don't know how many times we were awaken in the middle of the night by gangs of dogs rivaled only by the 'Bloods' and 'Cryps' of Los Angeles. Cats on the other hand, just want some free food and they're good.
• American candy has monetary value among Arab-American children in the Middle East. We saved our American candy for special occasions, close friends and bribes. These things were the equivalent of cigarettes in prison.

Well, that's all I got for ya. There are many more lessons for me to teach you, but alas, my time is up for today. Look forward to future lessons from...

LIFE IN THE THIRD WORLD.