Wednesday, May 25, 2005

SportsCenter or NYCenter?

" Do you think anybody will see this?!" Brought to you by Badia
I turned on the television earlier tonight and decided I wanted to check out one of my favorite television programs, Sportscenter.As expected, the Yankees and Mets game seemed to monopolize much of my Sportscenter time. Never mind that there were teams with much better records playing.
Annoyed, I watched as the anchors also reminded us to tune in to, what else, the Yankees-Redsox game on Sunday.
Wooptee Doo.
I can already see the opening highlight reel for sportscenter on Sunday night......a little defensive catch by Jeter here, a homerun by Manny there...(insert Sportscenter highlight reel beat,"du nuh nuh-du nuh nuh", and voila! A typical over-hyped Yankees/Redsox game shoved into our faces,and not the lightly-fluffed-whipped- cream-pie-in-the-face kind of shove...no, it's the big-brother-with-heavy-object-and I-cant-breathe-right-now-kind of shove.
Quite uncomfortable.
I understand that these are big cities with big money, but the rest of the country is left out to dry like a wet towel on a tree branch. It's not as if all of the people of the Midwest sit on ugly floral couches after a day of work in the corn fields and milking cows, excited to see 'big city folk'.
I mean, give us a break. We DO have a Walmart! What else do you need!?!?!? (Let the sarcasm ooze...wait, it's not done...there. Ahhhh, now doesnt that feel better?)
It's more than the bias, though. See, when I wait to watch the highlights from a Cardinals game, I get the same feeling I got when I was younger and my dad would forget to pick me up from my Aunt's house. I remember sitting and waiting patiently. It was awkward and unnecessary. It felt downright bad and I vowed never to go to anyone's house ever again. But of course I went to visit people, and of course, I continue to watch Sportcenter, no matter how neglected I feel.
I sit through highlight after highlight, changing the channel during commercials. I return to find the anchors telling us to check out how many hotdogs some skinny Japanese guy can eat.
"MAN," I think to myself, "I must've just missed the Cardinals. There's nooo way they showed the hot dog stuffin' Japanese guy before the National League Pennant winning Cardinals!"
but...what's this? According to the anchors, the Cardinals game highlights are after the break. Again.
How they tease me so. Sigh.
Yeah, yeah. I realize this is a topic discussed many times before, but what the heck, it's my turn to vent. The two Boston and New York producers working at Sportscenter (that's my theory anyway) need to give the rest of us a break. As Michael Wilbon of PTI put it once, we don't care about New York. And for the record, we don't care about Boston or Barry Bonds or anything beginning with 'B' for that matter, either.
As for the hot dog snarfing, skinny Japanese man, that's OK, as long as we get through all the highlights from the actual games first.
Now, if you don't mind, I have some corn eating to do on my ugly floral couch which, naturally, I will wash down with some fresh, albeit warm, milk.

This literary piece of work in the form of a comic book, by Joe Sacco, is a must read for anyone interested in learning about the Palestinian Cause. Check it out this summer.
Brought to you by Badia

Monday, May 23, 2005

Monday, May 16, 2005

Snack Packs and Crackerjacks

Mmmmmm, peanutbutter crackers. Quite the snack pack. Whoever created them was a genius. Or just really smart. Ok, we'll settle with cool. They're really cool. On that note, the Cardinals won again today. My sister (shout out to Nanners) and I were discussing the ability of this franchise to make or break our day. When the StL Cards win, it's like everything makes sense. Let me demonstrate the power it has over me. Situation A News dude: "...and in other news (isn't that what news-dudes say?)...the Cardinals lost today. What a shocker. Didn't see that one coming." Me: "NOOOOOOO! My day is ruined. .......How will I go on??? .....What's the meaning of life? Is there life out there? you know...out THERE...." Situation B News Dude: "...and in other news, the Cardinals won...again." Me: "Gee, peace in the Middle East IS possible!" ...And so you see, the difference between the Cards winning and losing is also the difference in how I handle a regular day. It could be gorgeous outside, with delicious smelling BBQ's, laughing babies, and a scenic sunset, but if the Cardinals lose, I forget all that and go to sleep at night wondering. I wonder what would have happened if we could have converted a potential double play to end the inning but instead only got one out, allowing the next batter to hit his 2 run homer which ultimately cost us the game. Yes, I will wonder about that and it will linger in my mind like a bad scent. Something I don't want to focus on but alas, what else is there to focus on when you keep wondering how on God's green earth such a stench was created. Your nose crinkles, your eyes close a bit as your brow works itself into a frown and you think about it consistently. Maybe if you figure it out, it will go away. My senses are all tied into this thing called baseball. Winning and losing also affects the way I taste things. Losing leaves a bitter taste in my mouth but when we win, MAN-OH-MAN do peanut butter crackers taste delicious. The Cardinals won today and I enjoyed every last bite of my peanutbutter cracker snack pack. Did I mention how delicious they are?
Like everyone else, I am going to die. But the words – the words live on
for as long as there are readers to see them, audiences to hear them. It is
immortality by proxy. It is not really a bad deal, all things considered.
-J. Michael Straczynski

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